Scandalous
by jennywashere
Summary: What happens in detention stays in detention.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I am Jack's inability to create something as cool as Naruto. And I also do not own the lyrics to Guilty Pleasures. Those belong to Cobra Starship.

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"Hey have you seen the new horror movie?" were the first words the dark haired girl heard when she walked into the room.

"Which one?"

"The one with Jessica Alba. Man, she's hot!"

"My God. You boys are all the same. Do you even know what the movie's about, Naruto?"

"Ummm…. It's about this hot girl. Duh, Ino."

"Oh my god." The blonde girl muttered, "I don't know how you can deal with him Shikamaru." She said to the sleeping boy next to Naruto.

"Who cares." he mumbled, "Why are you here anyway? I didn't think you'd like to spend a Friday afternoon in detention?"

"Believe me, it wasn't my idea," Ino sighed as she sat down in a desk, "I'd rather be shopping."

"And I'm sure everyone else would rather be in here. With us." Shikamaru replied.

"Well, let's just see who else agrees with me," Ino looked around the room and spotted Hinata, "Hey Hinata, you'd rather be shopping than be in here with these losers, right? Wait, what are _you_ doing in here?"

"Did she just call us losers?" Naruto asked Shikamaru.

"I believe she did." He replied.

"Oh no she didn't!" Naruto was halfway out of his seat.

"Uzamaki! What have I said about getting out of your seat?" the principal said as he walked into the classroom and closed the door.

"Ummm… not to do it?" Naruto asked.

"Exactly." The principal said, "Maybe you'll finally learn it this year. Now everyone find a seat. And do not sit next to each other. Skip a desk in between." He stared at the sheet in his hand and then looked up, saying the name of each of the students in the room.

"Uzamaki, Nara,…. Yamanaka, Huuyga,… and Uchiha. It's always good to see new faces. Hmmm…. Now where is that other one?" the principal said as he stared at the paper in his hand.

"_I came here to make you dance tonight. I don't care if I'm a guilty pleasure for you."_ A voice sang from out in the hallway.

The principal walked to the door and opened it, allowing a young pink haired girl listening to her ipod to walk in.

"Ah. Glad you could make it, Ms. Haruno." The principal said, plucking the earphones out of the girl's ears and taking the ipod.

The girl scowled but then smiled, a twinkle of amusement in her green eyes, "And miss this wonderful day of detention? I wouldn't dream of it."

The principal sighed and shook his head, closing the door while muttering under his breath, "What am I going to do with you?"

"So he's just going to leave us in here by ourselves?" Ino asked.

"First time in detention, eh?" Sakura replied as she strolled to the teacher's rolling chair.

"Yeah, kinda." Ino said.

"Mine, too." A quiet voice said from the back.

Sakura looked up from rifling through the teacher's desk, smiling she winked at Hinata and said, "Don't worry. Detention's not so bad— "

"Says the girl that always has it. Do you really think you should be doing that?" the raven haired boy interrupted.

"It speaks." Sakura's eyes widened dramatically the narrowed, "Here's an ever better question, my dear. What are _you_ doing in _here_?" she said while waving her hands around the room. She got up and walked toward the boy sitting in the back. She sat down in the desk in front of the boy and leaned forward on her propped up arm. "Everyone I'd like to introduce Sasuke Uchiha or as I like to call him, Mr. I-Think-I'm-Better-Than-Everyone-Else-So-I-Can't-Speak-With-Those-Less-Than-Me."

"Or Mr. I've-Got-A-Stick-Shoved-Up-My-Butt." Naruto jumped in.

"Ooh. That's a good one. I'll have to remember it." She said, bumping fists with Naruto.

"So are you gonna tell us why you're here?" she continued.

"No." Sasuke said, crossing his arms.

"Okay. Fine. Be that way. Hmmm… okay, everyone get in a circle." Sakura stated, pulling the desk away.

"Ummm… Sorry but I have to ask. Why?" Shikamaru questioned.

Sakura shrugged her shoulder and said, "Well, we have forty-five minutes left of this hell. So we might as well have some fun."

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow in question and Sakura smirked, "Storytime."

After they got the desks in a circle and everyone settled down, Sakura explained her idea of "storytime."

"It's pretty simple actually. All you have to do is tell us how you got in detention. Okay?"

"Wait," Ino said, "What about those of us that haven't had detention before?"

Sakura looked at her questioningly.

"I mean," Ino continued, "You, Shikamaru, and Naruto always get detention for the same thing. Shikamaru sleeps during class, Naruto plays some stupid prank and always ends up getting caught and you," Ino turned to look at Sakura, "You always talk back to the teachers. I just don't want the news that I've been in detention to get around. And I'm sure Hinata and Sasuke don't either."

"Okay, how about this?" Sakura said thoughtfully, "The first rule of detention is that you don't talk about detention. Deal?"

"So it's kinda like Fight Club?" Hinata quietly spoke up.

"Shh. Don't talk about it!" Sakura nodded while putting her hand over the girl's mouth.

"Heck yes! I'm in!" yelled Naruto.

"So troublesome," Shikamaru mumbled, rolling his eyes, "Okay."

"I'm in, too." Hinata said.

"So am I," stated Ino. "What?" she said to everyone's stares. "It's not like there's anything better to do." She shrugged.

They all turned to stare at Sasuke, burning holes into him with their eyes.

"Hn."

"Yay!" Sakura clapped her hands.

"That was a yes?" Ino muttered. Sasuke turned and glared at her. "Geez. I'm sorry. Alright? Don't kill me!" she said as she threw her arms up defensively.

"So," started Shikamaru, "Who's first?"

"Ooh. Me! Me! Pick me!" Naruto shouted.

"Okay! Okay! If it'll get you to stop shouting in my ear." Shikamaru groaned, having unfortunately chosen the desk next to Naruto.

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	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto.

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"Okay. So I had this really awesome prank planned." Naruto stated.

"Awesome? Really?" Sakura asked.

"Of course. Everything I plan is awesome. Like this one time I —"

"Naruto. Get back to the original story. We don't really care about your 'awesome plans.' " Ino said as she finger-quoted her last two words.

"Fine. Whatever. Can't really give away the good stuff anyway." said Naruto as he continued on with his tale. "So here was my brilliant plan. I asked Neji if he had big hand disease. That's all. It wasn't even harmful. Well, except to him I guess," shrugged Naruto.

"Big hand disease!? Are you serious?" Sakura said through her tears, her hand muffling her laughter. "I haven't heard that since fifth grade. Haha. Except we said cancer instead."

"Wait. Hold on. What's big hand disease?" Ino asked.

"You had never heard of big hand disease as a kid before?" Shikamaru chuckled. "And Neji actually fell for it?"

"I know. I didn't think it would happen either." Naruto replied.

"Is no one going to explain this to me? I can't be the only one who has never heard of it." Ino said angrily.

"Chillax, Princess. I'm sure little anti-social emo boy over here is just as lost as you are," said Sakura. "Naruto, would you do us the honor?"

"Why of course. So Ino you want to know what big hand disease is?"

"Just get on with it, Naruto."

"How about a demonstration?" Naruto smirked.

"How about no." Ino retaliated.

"Fine, fine. So here's how it went…."

_5 hours earlier…._

"Neji! I'm so sorry. I just heard the news. Are you sure you should be doing that?" asked Naruto as he walked up to Neji, who was putting his books in his locker. Neji turned his head to glare at the blonde, but Naruto went right on talking, "I mean I heard it was bad. And that you were dying, but you're here…..Does it hurt?"

"Does what hurt?" replied Neji, still putting his books away.

"Big hand disease."

"What?" said Neji as he stared at the hand that was holding his books.

"It's where your hand is bigger than your face." Naruto said.

They both stared at Neji's hand.

"Hold it up to your face." Naruto whispered.

-- _back to detention_

"So you ended up getting detention for fighting with Neji?" Ino asked.

Naruto shrugged, "I don't really know. I kind of blacked out at the end after I told him to put his hand up to his face."

"Wait. If you're in detention because of fighting, the how come Neji isn't in detention too?" Hinata asked.

Naruto shrugged his shoulders again.

"Oh", Shikamaru said as he lean back in his chair, "While you were out Naruto, Neji used his extraordinary debating skills and said he acted in self defense. And it didn't help that the teacher that stopped the fight just happened to be the one whose chair you put glue in earlier today."

"Hmmm… That teacher, eh?" said Naruto. "She always said she couldn't wait to give me detention."

"I would think any teacher would want to put you in detention and keep you there." commented Sasuke.

"Okay. So moving on. Who's next?" Sakura said as she looked around the group. "How about you, Hinata?"

"Okay, but I'm telling you that it wasn't anything big really." Hinata said.

"If it wasn't big then why are you in detention?" Shikamaru questioned her.

"Oh. Ummm…." Hinata blushed, "Well, I kinda skipped class."

"Kinda? How can you kinda skip class?"

"Well you see I went to class and I just didn't feel like being there. So I asked the teacher for the bathroom pass and just never came back." Hinata said as she scratched her head.

Everyone stared at her in shock.

Sakura spoke first, "I think it's a sign of the end of the world or something."

"Ohmigod. Someone should declare this day a holiday." Ino mused.

"And call it what? Skip School Because You're Well Day?" Shikamaru stated. "Yeah, good luck with that."

"But that's not all you did, right?" Sasuke said all of a sudden. "I heard you did something else. Something that could get you expelled."

_(to be continued...)_

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Guitar Hero rocks my socks!


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